LRAE Poetry

I’ve been shown these  places called  homes,   but they don't feel the same as what  I used to call my own Will any of these houses  make me as impressed?  If my state of mind is the same,  will they all feel like the rest?  there’s a bed to be slept and a pantry for  food to be kept,  however, I have this feeling that something is  missing to  my left,  perhaps,  I'm  o nly  homesick Why is it difficult for  me to  move far away? There is nothing left for  me here anyways, but why must I be  compelled to stay? I know that I have to leave, there's elsewhere to go packing my bags today, I'll create my home again I'll remember everything and I won't hold any regret you've grown from  the hardships spent, you've restored  from  the loves that went, treat yourself as if you were entering a home, with dignity and respect - Leah Rae

I'll fold up a hundred paper dollar  bills to help you stabilize a person like you has a millionaire type of mind, so if you're willing to put  in  work,  I'll consider giving you my time I’ll fold up a thousand  paper cranes  to help you fly a person like you is   hard to come by, so if you have a lonely end  to  be tied, I'll offer you my line I'll fold up a million paper hearts and send them to some sad valentines a person like you knows better  than   to  keep someone waiting on the sidelines  so if you want to know me as I am, all you have to do is look into my eyes I'll fold up a billion paper planes and shoot them through the Oregon pines a person like you pays attention to the signs, so if you happen to  be  in that area,  explore the leaves for what you may find I'll fold up a trillion paper petals and  make  them into flowers growing on a vine so if you're walking the  mountain ...

it's a melancholic scene, the choir lined up in a ring, they sing in sync, a melodious hymn Who was the real masked reaper  before  they turned into the grim? living in a euphoric world  with a family of nymphs cropped their plants as usual  and went with bubblegum life  barely chewing by the bits before they began to take off  heads using a gardening scythe they stopped cutting off bellflowers with a regular switchblade knife they’re the only sign of hope  that’s left in these deserted ruins, an abandoned away cemetery,  lay the bones of a million humans it could be made into a wonderland if only we’d paint the roses, if we were honest with each other  instead  of ignoring the truth under our   noses the moon is gone, but there’s  two burning hot suns there has to be more in existence,  we selflessly cannot be the only ones - Leah Rae

you’ve been talking to yourself,  trying to  figure  out what's  wrong  with your mental health so, you went to the local  apothecary and  they gave to you  a taste of maraschino cherries you asked them, “Why is my head so scary? Is all this overthinking really necessary?" they kept you for a couple of nights  to  watch your brain and how its waves rise, you woke up from a bad dream at 3AM, but you were almost to Stage 5 in REM this nightmare you remembered vividly  and it made you cry when you woke up the next morning I wish I could find a cure  that  would make your pain go away, I wish I could pick out your demons,  but they’re invisible through the X-ray I wish I could mine rare healing gemstones and solve these questions you have about the unknown  I'd find a safe place to bury  your misery deep  down  below,  somewhere that nobody goes,  a secret garden no one knows I'd explode...

my mind tries to strategize between writing  down everything or letting it be forgotten trying to figure out what exactly I'm looking at seems like a paper with black ink blotted I persuade myself that if I keep  writing, there's a possibility I will find the reason I have a tendency to attach  metaphors  with materials, there has to be a meaning something that's hidden between  lines, the cautionary in fine print I could write my whole life and  still, I'd only come up with a hint my mind isn’t present whereas  my body stands undefeated it's like I’m searching for the words to describe the feeling,  but there’s always more to be  asked and less to be answered I miss when I was younger, when my skeleton was a dancer although, I wouldn’t move quite  right and  my back would go stiff I came down with heaviness that  my strength didn't know how to lift there’s a sense in me trying to balance  between hopef...

I see ghosts! Can you see them too? Do you notice the green light  or does it look more like blue? Didn’t you feel the wind  that blew in through the shutters? Did you feel like something was there  in the  middle of the night and hid under the covers? do not fear them, they’re the  same as your own shadow they'll follow you unconsciously  even when you don’t want them to it takes a brave heart  to accept these spirits to see them as your wise elders  who display a virtuous merit you walk alone in the  graveyard  now,  you’re merely fearless they keep you company during the  bereft  of your happiness  soon you'll discover that  the  dead  always makes a grand  appearance there's no such thing as keeping  thoughts  to yourself,  the ghosts listen, and they hear us - Leah Rae

you’re the monster  and I’m your friend We live fast to die young,  will I have to see you again? you stick pins and needles into  my body as if I am your voodoo doll pour me up a fifth of gasoline while  I mistake it as being alcohol you love to tamper things for me  while you say you’re my protector I’m the only grasshopper left and I’ve  been warned that you’re a bug collector shadowed in a canopy of black curtains, sheering out the darkness of your burdens there's a sense of elegance to your facade, with a bed of satin and a piano of ivory white I shouldn't have sipped your bottle of red wine, you fed me a match for dinner  and watched me ignite I'm letting myself digress,  you sparked my flame like a catalyst but this violent delight has  even more brutal of an end, I don't know how to keep loving you, and I've lost my willpower to pretend - Leah Rae

once, there was a newborn  baby with fresh smooth skin she had bright eyes and  a glow from within soft on the surface  with innocence inside, all was lost on the  first day that she lied formerly beautiful,  she’d been broken over and over again by  people  she thought she'd trusted a baby with indigo in her soul  and a rainbow of imagination stuck between worlds, loss the feeling  of joy and allowed in deprecation some scars, some bites,  some bruises she knew she could find  herself  if she that's what she chooses to look at the whole picture  and come up with any possibility this was her chance to redeem  herself and to be set free healed wounds, healed tattoos,  healed heart she looked back on where she  belonged right from the start all of the battles in life, she has  since learned to be equipped with her strongest angel and  weakest demon, she refuses to  resist,  she refuses to g...

another Sunday afternoon, I would love for you to stay,  do you have to go so soon? the bell tolls ring for  a name and a memory watching from a distance as an outsider  has the same appeal as a mercenary for a writer that wants to know the story,  for an artist who wants to share their coloring we all grieve differently,   it's a process of suffering your feelings are valid no  matter how minor or severe whatever the case may be,  it's justly your greatest fear this service held today is devoted to our  loves had that have since been lost for the mistakes made that’ve since been taught, for the barriers that we've since left uncrossed I know how hard it can be to exist,  but  you're strong enough to get through this - Leah Rae

this almost isn’t real,  every  note  is played perfectly the experience is surreal  sounds from the bassist and   the pianist blend together naturally  fulfilled by the melodic tones the band itself isn’t well-known,  but they help to set the mood in the moment their presence isn’t always noticed because  people are more focused on their meal or their conversation, take a minute to close down the  world and give them a listen whether you’re in a restaurant  or walking through town, find a spot on a bench or someplace to sit down wellness is a difference in your life that’s  similar to the band in the background while it may go unnoticed, you should  appreciate the atmosphere and the sound because eventually, you’ll see how much better of a place you’re in if you sit back for a second and listen to the  silence,  you’ll hear much more of your thoughts from within they may sound like strings to a violin  and your ...

my left to my right  side  is like red to blue, how a portrait is to a statue one side is realistic,  the other is unexpressive the few I let in are those  amongst the selective there’s icicles in the summer and heatwaves during winter I know of a saint who  spoke to a sinner he faced out the palm  of his hand and said, “Our beliefs may differ, but  your perspective I respect  and I will  consider . ” His response was, “I’m not sure  of any  of it either, but I’m not  necessarily  an unbeliever.”  the epiphany struck, it depends  on the sight of the perceiver the one who orchestrates the ideas  in their mind as the original conceiver on the outside is heat, but on the  inside is  a coldness you could see through after all, you’re looking  at another one of you - Leah Rae

there’s been a pile in the  corner for over a decade Probably longer, who’s  keeping track nowadays? molded into a mound of mess, You talk behind everyone’s back,  but how do you dress? your clothes have moved  from  the basket to the bed, unmade with strings  hanging off by a thread When is the right time to  cut them off at the stitches? with an uncomfortable bed,  you’ll constantly switch positions it’s time to wash the clothes  and hang them to dry clothespins and all, t his is how to detoxify fold them up and stack   the pieces into a closet hide away the rest of t hose  secrets along with the gossip from now on, use a  soap  that comes solid don't settle for a kind that's purely toxic I'm done with stepping  around  your dirty laundry you use your words  as weapons brutally it's no one's place to  critique someone  else's life by scrutiny I'll save my quarters  and  choose to  ...

being called sweetheart  by strangers is not my forte  I wonder how I appeal to  the population, what I portray  Do they notice the difference in my  energy when I’m having a bad day? when I’m tired and my eyes are  closing with my legs starting to sway I’ve always wanted to wear pink silk s lippers and learn how to point my toes in ballet I picture myself sitting in the back  corner with my coffee at a small cafe wearing leopard print with red lipstick,  somewhere outside smoking a cigarette hair done tousled and brunette and  the lighting  is shading off half of my face  as if I were sketched into the background vignette I won’t stay at the table long enough to  make  any impressions, my presence is impermanent these recent times have been unfortunate, but they make a current event for a journalist try not to get caught in a trap trust no one, watch your back with love, Novelette - Leah Rae

butcher my feelings and  declare the act as third degree coat my body thickly with  honey and release a hive of bees cut down all the orange trees so  I can’t get a source of vitamin C made me scream so loud that  my voice can no longer sing captured me like a bird  and clipped off my wings take away everyone I love  because you want to watch me grieve vanished everything that  once made me happy truth is, when I’m alone  I find myself in sanguinity and I’m afraid to let that  be taken away from me I can freely express my femininity a goddess on her way to reaching divinity people have too big of an ego,  they think they are forcibly powerful I stay away from those who will  try so  hard to have me under their control I prefer to seep inside people’s minds  and  get intimate by staring into another’s eyes - Leah Rae

dancing around in a body that’s boney spinning around like a pocket full of posies ashes ashes, skeletons in a casket beautiful tragedy, passionate and tragic the potential burned out like a box of matches face down in an ice cold ocean alight from Titanic staring down at your picture pierces through  my heart and I’m left feeling poignant   you let me know you’re around through  a ring in my left ear or a flicker of a light,  you access me through clairvoyance - Leah Rae

knuckles are bloody from trying to pull open steel bars I’ve kept a hidden collection  inside of a book of glass shards screaming for mercy, but the  guards ignore me as I shout, “You have the wrong  person,  would you please let me out!” “Why’d you scream  this  morning?” He asked, now you decide to care about how I feel, but that won’t last the silence is letting in, and  I  refuse  to give in to a false identity last night you were fighting with  me as I was telling you to leave bad temperament is  hereditary, my back  is  hurting from this  baggage I’ve been carrying enough is enough, I’ve had it with you think about everything, what we've gone through I never want to go back, having  to  mark   down  each  tally, I can no longer keep track here’s to the home  that set itself aflame  this isn’t worth it, it’s not a fair game - Leah Rae