Sheep in the Sky
my only wish is
to exist in the days
that I miss
if only I could see that
special day one more time
daydreaming as I'm counting
twenty three sheep in the sky
and even if it's going to
be a clouded foggy memory
take me back to the old
lived in room I used to adore
the nail polish stains
covering my floor
life is so mysterious,
so unpredictable
it does the unthinkable,
feels unbearable
and I think back to
visiting my friend's house
the collections of small trinkets and
art supplies that were so shiny and neat
the park we'd go to,
the people we'd meet
music that plays from a distance
trapped in my mind's daunting resistance
it is always going to be hard to understand
why bad things happen to good people
there's constant reminders
to thread a new needle
you have to have the
dark to see the light
no matter what age I am,
I still don't sleep through the night
it's hard to articulate my defense
when there's too much going on
there words are there,
this is all so wrong
jumping out in mismatched pieces,
I want a redo on that part of my life,
to tell my younger self
not to go on that path,
don't waste any more time,
don't put your own life on the line
- Leah Rae